The Toddler Diet

Any good diet has two parts - watching food portions and getting exercise. The Toddler Diet does both:

First the food portions. Step 1 - Make yourself a sandwich. Step 2 - Eat about a third of it. Step 3 - Toddler sees you eating and asks for a bite, so you give him one. Step 4 - Begin to alternate bites with toddler until last fourth of sandwich remains. Step 5 - Toddler takes rest of sandwich and devours it. This process works with just about any food that you are trying to eat, not just sandwiches. Does not work if you put the food on the toddler's plate.

Second, exercise. In most diets this is the hard part, but in the Toddler Diet it is actually quite easy. Live with toddler (or better yet, two of them). Attempt to dress toddlers - one tip from wrestling, control the hips. Be responsible for keeping younger toddler out of toilet, out of pantry, and out of older brothers' room. At same time, keep older toddler from breaking older brothers' battleship, climbing any bookshelves, or playing under any household faucet. Take him shopping for a really good workout.

Toddlers aren't just lovable. They serve a practical purpose as well - keeping us moms young and fit!